I had two of these a day at 10am and 4pm, and they definitely weren’t my favourite. The predominant tastes, for me, were kale and cucumber with an aftertaste of celery- not ideal, coinciding with both the arrival of the woman who sells bacon sandwiches in our office each morning, and the 4pm ‘slump’ experienced by most office workers. Watching all my colleagues chow down on Haribo while I supped on that was a pretty tough to take though.
I didn’t expect to hate this one as much as I did, but I really did. The overriding flavour was the carrot and the ginger, and I didn’t like it. By day 4 I had come to accept it, but you certainly won’t find me whizzing up a similar concoction in my Breville activ blend any time soon. Not for me.
NB I haven’t put a photo of my scales up to be a dick, I did it because I know that ultimately, that is what people are interested in, the weightloss. I toyed with the idea of skin and body shots, but no, the scales will have to do.
- Weight: 56.5 kilos
- I feel weird. I feel hungry. Is this what self deprivation feels like? Do people actually enjoy it?
- Everyone is taking every possible opportunity to taunt me and eat food in front of me. Thankfully the ‘treat table’ in the office isn’t stocked up.
- I always stick at challenges- which is why I hardly ever challenge myself, because IT SUCKS.
- What is on my mind: cauliflower cheese, burgers, celery sticks with crunchy peanut butter, sausage rolls, Thai food and hot buttered toast.
- It felt gritty against my teeth, but the charcoal lemon one was actually the best tasting of them all.
- I HATE the orange one.
- Never mind a juice cleanse, there’s going to be a cleanse of every annoying person in my life if I feel like this for the remaining four days.
- Dreading the tea and the beetroot juice- the latter is going to hurt.
- Actually vaguely looking forward to the cashew mylk- god, even that spelling is annoying me.
- I NEVER smoke at work but had to smoke two cigarettes
- Chewing gum helps, a little bit, gives jaws something to do and takes away the taste of goodness- bleurgh.
- Water intake: painful
- Trips to the loo: countless (will keep count tm)
- Everyone thinks I am insane/attention seeking/body dysmorphic.
- Brilliant sleep
- Energy levels are fine
- Feeling less stabby.. (UPDATE: no I don’t)
- Rob came to see me today for a little pep talk and drop off my other juices. He says-I’m not hungry, that I just want to eat. I say- whatever, this is torture. I’ve got to hand it to the guy though, he has been pretty much bang on in everything he said about how I would find the process. I think he regretted asking a passing colleague about my mood though, ha.
- Things on my mind: Pret ham & egg baguettes, salted pistachios, ice-cream sundaes, spaghetti carbonara, a bacon sandwich, everything from Sugardough, Coca cola, chocolate hobnobs, sushi and asparagus with soft boiled duck’s egg.
- Just had the almond mylk, the spelling of that is still making me feel annoyed too.
- Had the dentist, actually a positive result which improved my slightly jaded mood a lot.
- I don’t trust the tea, rob says it’s not a laxative but I’m not so sure. I shared a bed with someone who drank a laxative tea before bed and let’s just say it was not a restful night’s sleep.
- I’ve had 17 wees, soon to be 18 (sorry).
- Skin is looking terrible, really bad… great.
- I really want to eat something. I feel annoyed, about most things
- Food that’s been on my mid: Fried breakfast, soup and crusty bread, tacos, brownies, macaroni cheese and tomato and mozzarella salad, mozzarella en carroza, Nutella.
- Still loads of energy and I definitely feel thinner.
- Really really hectic day, mini crisis at lunchtime made me want to eat, made me realist that Rob probably was right about whether I’m actually hungry or I just want to eat out of habit… Oh.
- Less weeing, this is good as am getting to know my colleagues lavatory routines a little too intimately. Awkward.
- That tea is rank.
- Found myself looking forward to the cashew mylk again and borderline enjoyed my 2pm charcoal lemonade.
- Cannot believe I have gone three days without eating, so proud of myself.
- How am I actually on to day 4 of not eating. Am feeling infuriatingly chipper too.
- Asleep before BBCQT had even finished and slept through until 8am
- Woke up really easily.
- 55kg exactly in the morning and when I left the office.
- Less irritable today, positively perky in fact. But my spots look baaaad.
- I got handed an actual kebab by someone unaware of my plight, turning that down hours before the challenge pushed me to the absolute brink.
- By 11pm I felt victorious, genuinely, pathetically pleased with myself.
Here’s what Rob had to say about my cleanse:
- more energy (y)
- weightloss (y)
- better sleep (y)
- reduced bloating (y)
- clearer skin
- better hair
- improved vision
- clearer thinking (y)
- inch loss/flat stomach (y)
- a general feeling better about yourself (y)
My thoughts and conclusions on the juicytox juice cleanse:
This post is already a monster so I’ll keep it brief. I marked the list above with a letter y against all of the ones that applied to me, and as you can see, it’s a pretty impressive resume. My skin was an issue, but it’s a problem anyway and it has cleared up this week, and it is very much down to my hormones too (sorry boys).
It was a complete and utter wildcard of an experiment, and it’s been fascinating, and has tested my minerals in a way that hasn’t happened since the last time I gave up smoking. It has made me think differently about my eating habits and my appetite has reduced since doing it. I was expecting to get some wicked headaches, but not a single one.